School

Sometime during my busy Friday at work, a friend sent a message that asked, "Did you hear about Connecticut?" I said "No", but I was too busy to inquire further when I got no response back. At a school program that night, someone mentioned a shooting that had happened. I looked at my husband who said, "At a school. A kindergarten class." A knot formed in my stomach that has grown with each new detail I've read. In a few short hours my family will wake and 4 of the 5 of us will go off to school. I believe that God is in control of my life. I believe that if it is my time to leave this earth it will happen, and if it's not it won't, and that God knows when that day will be and no one can change that - not me or my family or someone with a gun. But today I want to stay home. I really don't want to sit in my office inside the school's front doors. I don't want two of my kids in different parts of the building and my other kid in a building across town. I want to be home cleaning the house and wrapping presents and preparing for Christmas as a family. But life is not about hiding away, so today I will hug my kids a bit tighter and pray a bit harder, and we will go.