"What if there is no happy in school?"

We're working on looking for the positive in school this year, but so far B's response is: "What if I can't find the happy in school? What if there is no happy in school?" I'm not sure if that's better or worse than his response to the first day of school last year: "Mom, what can you do to get me out of this?" :(

This breaks my mom-heart and makes me question if I am doing the right thing. I've considered home schooling. I've thought and prayed about it for two years. I've visited with friends about it. I have not felt right about doing it. I took a job at my son's school where I'm close to him (that's not why I took it, but I felt like it would be a good perk). I'm confident he has a good teacher and he is in a good school, but as his mom I wonder if that's good enough for him.

Right now we'll keep loving and encouraging him at home and in school. We'll give him opportunities to be exactly who God made him to be, and we'll encourage him to be his best everywhere. And we'll keep praying and parenting as best as we can. Even when the answers don't come easy.

Everything a girl needs

I opened a piece of mail just now that had been laying on the counter. It was really just junk mail, so I'm not sure why I even opened it. It was from a tween magazine my daughter has received in the past through gift subscriptions. It's not a bad company, and she has enjoyed the magazine. This correspondence was an attempt to get me to renew her subscription (sorry, that's the grandparent's job if they choose to do so). One line in the letter jumped out at me as was intended. It was in bold, set apart from the other text, indented, and even used my daughter's name.

It's everything Faith needs to enjoy being a girl...
as you help prepare her for her teen years and beyond.

 Wow. I thought it took love and dedication and hard work. I thought it took teachers and friends and other caring adults. I thought it took guidance and prayer. I thought it took time and more time and even more time invested in her. But I guess all it takes is the right magazine. Thanks, American Girl, you just freed up a lot of my time...

All consuming

2 months ago I was on my way to Africa. I have stories and pictures and blog posts trapped in journals, on hard drives and in my head. I want to get them out and share my amazing experiences, but something else has been consuming me.

There is so much else I feel like I should also be doing this summer but can't quite manage; a garden of intention left to grow weeds (both literally and figuratively).

But instead, I'm learning to parent. Remember those all consuming days after welcoming a newborn into your home? Whether the first or second or beyond, it was a time of getting to know a new person and figuring out who they are and how you fit together as a family. I feel like I'm doing that all over again as we transition into the middle school years. Our daughter is an amazing, creative, passionate person. She is strong and opinionated and moody. (Not unlike me.) We are learning how to fit together as a family again. She is more independent than she's ever been before, she's making more of her own decisions than she has before, and most days she's more moody than she's ever been before. I'm learning to be in charge without being controlling, to lighten up more on things that don't matter, and I think I'm praying more than I ever have before. And at the end of the day I'm completely drained and often emotional and still not sleeping through the night.