Too Safe?

My life is comfortable and it pretty much always has been. Sure I get bent out of shape sometimes and feel like I've been wronged or life isn't fair or certain things are harder than they should be, but life is still comfortable. In the midst of the comfort it's easy to fall into patterns of relying on myself and believing that I am in control. I begin to think of my friends and family as my world and forget that I'm not called to sit here in comfort but to be out in the dirt of the world.

I'm a creative, disorganized stay at home mom of 3 kids. I've got plenty of dirt, but it's all quite safe. At this time in my life my family is - and should be - my number one ministry. However, I'm open to other opportunities for ministry as well. I enrolled in a class on the creative use of technology in ministry, and I'm considering an opportunity to volunteer in a communication position for an organization I love and highly respect. These are exciting opportunities, but they too are quite safe.

I used to be a fearful person. I had mild to moderate panic attacks and often feared I was about to die. I still fear flying, and occasionally I'll take the stairs when I can't bring myself to get on an elevator. I've learned my triggers and coping skills and how to keep myself feeling safe. I accepted that, yes, I might have a heart attack or come crashing to the earth at a speed too great for my body to endure, but I can't control that. Plus, lying awake worrying at night became so exhausting that maybe I just got too tired to keep worrying (and years of pregnancy related hormones - my big trigger - finally leveled out).

Since i know how it feels to fear, it's easy to want life to stay, and feel, and be safe. I know I'll have a greater impact on the world if I get out of my comfort zone. In my head I'm willing to step out if the opportunity arises, but when a risky opportunity presents itself, how will I respond? Will I be able to see it as a prompting from God, or will I make excuses and stay safe?